Top 10 Things Heard This Weekend in Apache, OK

Those of you who actually read my blog (thanks, Mom!) know that my family and I went to Apache, OK this past weekend to attend the annual Apache Fair. Going to Apache is always a bittersweet event for me. Growing up in this small town of 1500 people was mostly a frustrating experience, and I spent my junior high and high school years plotting my escape. But even after almost twenty years of being away, I am tied to this place by my memories, my values, and my dreams for my own children — because the kind of town I ran from is exactly the kind of town I’d like to raise them in (but hopefully with a larger population by a factor of 10; alas, even I need at least a Wal-Mart, though I dare not hope for Super Target).

Why bittersweet? Going back reminds me of the many wonderful things about being raised in a town where everyone knows everyone, where the same families have farmed the same land for generation after generation, where the values are so traditional that Home Economics is a required course for girls and Shop (as in – woodworking, welding, leather tooling – such a useful craft, not) is a required course for boys. But, it also makes me sad, because many of the storefronts are boarded up, the family-owned businesses have been replaced by Sonic and Dollar General, and the landscape is dotted with barns falling into themselves, rusted cars and vans, and, in general, signs of the struggle of the lower-middle class.

The best way to describe it, I’ve decided, is Mayberry meets Sanford & Sons, with a Native American twist.

So, in a lighthearted way, I’m going to attempt to share with you some of the highlights of the weekend. Again, while this may appear like I’m poking fun – well, OK, it will be poking fun.  But, remember, I grew up here, so I’m allowed. I’m laughing with my fellow Apacheans, not at them.

#10: Do you feel that breeze?

There was a lot of controversy over the installation of the over 150 wind turbines southwest of Apache because of the blight on the landscape. Not surprising: when you have been living with an unobstructed view of the Wichita Mountains for years, and suddenly someone proposes to build 130 or so wind turbines across the horizon, that’s bound to put a bee in your bonnet. But the Slick Hills (as the foothills of the Wichitas are known) supposedly have some of the best wind in the U.S. The Blue Canyon Wind Farm now produces the energy equivalent of powering 60,000 cars on the road. Right now with gas hovering just under $4/gallon, I don’t think the residents mind so much anymore.

#9: We’ll have to wait our turn to get on the bridge.

We actually didn’t stay in Apache for the weekend; instead, we rented a cabin in Medicine Park, a tiny “tourist” village about half an hour a way just outside the Wichita Mountains and the Wichita Mountains Wildlife Refuge. If you can desensitize yourself to an over-abundance of junked out cars, scrap heaps, and crumbling mobile homes, Medicine Park is quite a cute destination and the natural beauty is astounding. Definitely worth a weekend trip from DFW, and I wrote all about it recently on DFWMama.com (The Best DFW Family Getaway You’ve Never Heard Of – The Wichita Mountains of Oklahoma). But my mention here is just about the one-lane bridge that goes across the river in Medicine Park and joins East Lake Drive with West Lake Drive. You don’t see many of these anymore, so Jack wanted to just keep driving back and forth across it for the novelty effect. (By the way, we do NOT own the Mini…I’ve got the Mini-Van, remember?)

#8: Look, it’s Tow-mater!

Continuing on the Medicine Park recap, we found what must be the actual model for Tow-Mater from the movie Cars. I made Jim turn around and go back by it just so I could get a picture. I truly don’t think you could find a better example of the rusted out tow truck depicted in the movie. I even think I heard him call out “Get-R-Done” as we drove by.

#7: Meet you at the store right by the giant scorpion.

Medicine Park is something of an artist’s community, and one of the most well-known artist in residence is Robert Dean, who creates larger-than-life metal sculptures. Many of these are on display at local museums, businesses, and homes, and feature prominent animals of the Wichita Mountains Wildlife Refuge (e.g., buffalo, elk, eagles, etc.). However, we saw one of a huge scorpion (for sale, by the way, though price was not listed) along the main “drag” of shops by the Creek Walk. Definitely would not want to meet this one in the dark. Jim and I think if we hadn’t had two antsy boys in the backseat, we’d have taken a tour around the area just to see all of the different pieces Dean had created as they are all pretty amazing, and none quite so disturbing as the scorpion.

#6: Wow!  Look at the view from the wastewater treatment plant!

The fact that the most beautiful real estate in at least a 200 mile radius (the landscape around Decatur, TX being my comparison point) is used by a waste water treatment plant is astounding to me. With a view of the Wichita Mountains (including a prime view of Mt. Scott, the tallest of the range), Lake Lawtonka, and the surrounding hills, this plot would be turned into million dollar homes (or, adjusted for OK prices, maybe $250K homes). Seriously, it made my heart sad to see the reportedly $32.5MM facility sitting smack dab on top of the best view in the area.

#5: Hey, the stoplight is working!

I remember when the blinking red stoplight was installed at the main intersection in town…sometime when I was in junior high (in the early 80′s). It seemed like no time at all had passed before the light burned out. No one seemed to notice, really, and it took years before it was replaced. Clearly progress has been made because the light was blinking when we drove through town.

#4: We had 60,000 people come through last year.

Our little town of Apache, OK is host to one of the largest Rattlesnake Festivals in the U.S. Yes, I said Rattlesnake Festival. The Apache Rattlesnake Festival was created by some local townspeople (one of whom was my high school best friend’s Dad; you can see and hear him on the video below) back in 1986, and features guided snake hunts, contests for the longest/heaviest/ugliest rattlesnake, an ever-growing flea market/craft fair, and a carnival. Last year, they had 60,000 people come through for the 3-day event, and Discovery America was there to film it. There is even a video on YouTube of the 2008 Festival! Wow! Pretty good for this small hometown.

#3: Should we stop and pray in the Prayer TeePee?

Every town has one of these, right?

Seriously, at a loss for words. All I can say is the teepee has been there as long as I can remember. I never have understood it (nor have I been inside).

#2: Moooo!

One of the big attractions of the Fair is Livestock judging. Most FFA students (Future Farmers of America, for those of you who don’t know what FFA stands for), which almost all of the Apache Public Schools student body is a member of, have animals that they show at fairs such as this for prize money and bragging rights. The night we were at the fair was cattle judging night, so Jack and Luke got plenty of opportunity to see cows. I think this was the first real “Moo” they had ever heard (poor things, usually it’s me trying to sound like a cow when I sing Old MacDonald).

#1: Wheeee!!!

This was the first time Jack ever got on a Merry Go Round. It warmed my heart beyond belief that he did so for the first time at the Apache Fair, where I’m sure was my first Merry Go Round ride. He had such a good time, he rode it three more times before moving on to the Bounce House.

AND A BONUS #1: I should have had the Indian Taco.

If you have had the pleasure of tasting an Indian Taco before, count yourself in the lucky few. Other than a Big Mac (one of my other loves – two of which I had this weekend, by the way), it must be one of the highest fat/highest calorie concoctions on the planet. With frybread as the base, smothered in beans, beef, cheese, lettuce, and salsa (and guacamole if you can find it), it is the perfect food to refill your fuel tank at a Fair. I daydreamed of my Indian Taco for a week before we actually got to the Fair, and when the moment came, I relished it. My husband, to his dismay, got a Frito pie. A few hours later, he was wishing he’d gone with the Indian Taco. When will he learn to listen to his smart wife??